When new clients call me for a consultation, it’s often because their team or department is in conflict.  The first question asked is usually “How do we improve office communication?”    Many times managers want to focus on the skills necessary to communicate better. While skill development is important, it’s only the tip of the iceberg.   To improve office communication you not only need to change the behaviors that lead to poor communication, but the assumptions that lie beneath the surface. 

Assumption One: So-and-So is the problem.   Teams often want to attribute their communication problems to one or two “bad eggs.”  In my experience, poor communication is rarely about one person.   Instead, assume that each person has good intentions and focus on agreements for how to communicate with one another.  This will create more sustainable changes in not only individuals but your work culture. 

Assumption Two:  I don’t need to improve or change.  A close cousin to the Assumption One: if someone else is the problem, than I am not part of the solution.  Communication will improve immeasurably if each person on the team takes personal responsibility for their part in the communication process.   By encouraging people to be introspective and accountable for their impact in conversation, your team will move away from fault-finding and toward joint-problem solving. 

Assumption Three:  If Only You Heard What I Said.  Many communication breakdowns stem from each person attempting to persuade, cajole or argue the other person into their version of what was said in any given interaction.  Because each person comes to conversations with different filters based on their background and unique set of experiences, you will never get a completely clear picture of who said what to whom.  Instead, assume that the impact of your communication is the response that you get.  This will get you much closer to creating more positive and productive interactions.   

Assumption Four: If only everyone would agree!  It can be tempting to think the solution to improving communication is to get everyone to agreement.   In reality good communication begins with getting people into dialogue.  Many of the problems I see in teams stem from people’s inability or unwillingness to say what’s on their minds.  By encouraging dialogue rather than agreement, you improve communication by increasing what the authors of Critical Conversations call the “pool of shared meaning.” 

What assumptions are getting in the way of good communication on your team?  Before you begin any communication training, identify and get rid of the ones that don't serve your team.